Well we are still waiting. The worst thing about being a parent , is the wait for appointments for your kids.

I think they do it on purpose. Not to get you upset, but to get you mentally prepared.
Is there any better way for your brain to realize how serious the situation is. I have to figure they don't do it to upset anyone. After all its the Dr's that always tell you being positive will help and attitude is everything.

My attitude now ..is getting better, it has to , Ill go crazy if i stay in the place I was at in my own head!

Amelia I love you so much! One day you'll read this, and wonder why your Daddy was so nervous, cause I know things will turn out O.K . It has to cause your here, and you make everything complete and good for me, your Mom , and big brother Ethan!

Till next time ...
Ride your life with pride, and walk your path with grace!

Realization

Well I think It finally hit me. My Little Lemon Drop, can't hear!

We both knew for a while, but I guess like all parents, you still hope that the test's were all wrong , and that Your daughter is just fine. In my daughters case, its quite real. Profound is the term. Profoundly hard of hearing is what sick kids told us, so with there opinion, I cant deny the truth any more. I must stop being so selfish , and just do the right thing for her , and her future.

Its hard when your living the way I do. I like a lot of other Dads commute along way for work, and I am not home during the week , so I miss a lot. Since I am gone so much , I tend to leave most things to my wife. 

She is the strongest person , next to my daughter that I know. She handles everything so well. I on the other hand, I seem to struggle with this. Is it the guilt of being gone? Is it just the fact that my little girl means so much to me, that I am just that worried? Or maybe I lack enough man in me to just be strong and right? 

I guess I still don't know, and will I ever ?

The next few days , or weeks will be very telling. MRI's CT scans, they will be coming up, and if all things turn out O.K  with the tests a Cochlear Implant could be her hope for hearing and speech.

bye 4 now' till the next need to express.. 

May your God grace you by night, and luck be on your shoulder by day!